Last Week

Sorry guys, no update on my world for a while as it’s been pretty busy around here. Last weekend I did get dragged out on another big adventure with the Humans to some place called Prague. I’ll blog more on this later suffice to say there seemed to be an inordinate amount of old buildings and statues of humans everywhere, what’s that all about eh?

One thing,  I met this curious animal with fluffy fur. I had the strangest urge to chase it around. In fact chase it and a bunch of its mates too. Weirdest thing…

DSC_0971  Are you laughing at my ball? It’s bloody lucky you are locked up mate else I’d have you…


My Weekend

The weekend was a bit dull compared to Fridays near end of the world experience.

I did get rumbled when I snuck into the pantry for some treats but with some quick thinking on my part, the Humans fell for the ole meces in the pantry line.

20150323-Pantry Honest, I was just checking for meces. I had no idea the treats bin was in here…

20150323-ghizzy1 I did a bit of ball  stalking which was fun.   This type of ball is one of my favs. Technical classification: “Furry Ball”, it usually starts life as a Humans tennis ball but with sharp teeth and a bit of patience you can skin the little bugger until only the basic lining of fuzz is left.

20150323-ghizzy2 The next step in creating your perfect furry ball is to ghizzy it up. A bit technical but basically ghizzyness is the amount of lovely slobbery saliva you can impart to the ball surface. That way you get to keep all those yummy tastes and smells that stick to the ball when thrown. Also feels rather nice in your mouth too.

20150323-ghizzy3 The humans keep banning this type of ball from the house, don’t know why they make such a fuss over it but I always manage to smuggle one into the house and hide it anyway.


Dark Times

Something odd has happened to the sky today. It looks like a meces has chewed a chunk out of the sun. It’s all gone dark and gloomy. Must be the end of the world, woe woe…

20150320-Woe A good day to stay in bed then

My theory is that what Boss-Human calls a solar eclipse is in fact the disintegration of the sun and the end of all life as we know it. Those meces have a lot to answer for I tell you and when I finally get my jaws around one…

On a brighter note though, while Boss-Human was distracted by the end  of the  world issues I snuck into the kitchen  and scored some of my fav treats from the strangely open  treats bin.


The Meces Situation Update

Well I remain vigilant but have not seen another Meces in the house since the Great Pantry Trapping of March 13. I do my rounds of the potential Meces hot spots but nothing… The Humans keep amusing themselves at me expense  with false “Get The Meces, Ralph!” alerts . I may have to make a bit of a fuss of my own to get them back. A bit of snorting and yipping at one of those hot spots should do the trick! Wadduya think?


Typical Day Out

As you may know I’m not keen on getting out of my nice comfy warm house so I’m always on the lookout for signs the Humans are off on some adventure so I can make myself scarce. This Saturday morning the signs were all there. Boots out, coats going on, much hurumphing from Boss and Grumpy-Human about the time it takes for Princess-Human to get ready. Then the terror of seeing my lead being bought out. I bugger off to bed and hope they forget me, alas to no avail.

Next thing we are out the front door. I’m praying we will turn right for the forest. If I have to go out then a walk and spot of ball catching in the forest is ok. So turn right, turn right  I scream…

Sadly we turn left and there it is, The Car… not The Car, please not The Car… Are we going for a few minutes drive, a few hours, once we went 14 hours!!! Bugger, should have peed when I had the chance.

I jumped in the back and  we set off and in only 30 minutes before we are there! Brilliant. It turns out Princess-Human and Curly-Human are going Go-Karting in nearby Limburg. I thought I might get a go but they left me outside.


Oh well nap time then, if I can sleep over that infernal noise.

Next a walk up to Limburg cathedral. A bit boring but I did get to sniff a few four legged friends along the way.


20150314-Church“I know I’m not allowed in there but could you please hurry up, its cold out here!”

Back in The Car, this time gladly, we are going home…

That’s my typical day out. Don’t see the point really when you can be warm and snug at home with all your balls.

The Ball Lover’s Guide to Balls by Ralph

Over the next few weeks I thought I’d run a little mini blog on balls to help all you fellow ball aficionados out there choose your balls. It’s a tough job, you have your hard balls, soft balls, holy balls, your fury balls with varying degrees of ghizzyness (technical term, I’ll explain later). Then there are your brand new balls some with dodgy bits of rope attached. I’ll be explaining how to get rid of that pesky rope the humans insist on attaching to some new balls.

This is a peek at a few balls from my extensive private collection, cool eh!

The Meces Situation

There is a mece in the house! I know this as I saw it come in from outside. Its taken some time to convince the dumb humans that it exists but they were finally convinced when it got into the favourite armchair and bit Grumpy-Human on the bum. This ensured much bashing of said chair and the escaping of one mece over to a nice toasty spot behind the computer tower.

I couldn’t convince Boss-Human it was there even when I made very loud snorting noises… go figure… Naturally it escaped again and all the Humans were convinced it had shot through to the outside world. Not me though, oh no, I knew the little bugger was still around.

Guess what? it has turned up in the pantry! Boss-human has declared war on it as its been stuffing its self with her vegetables. I wish it had stuffed its self with my crappy dry food the Humans store in there and keep trying to feed me.

I’ll update you guys later on the Meces Crisis.